The True Life of a Not So Fabulous Killjoy
by cityembers
Summary: Set in the concept of 'Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys' album by My Chemical Romance. It tells the story of a self-declared killjoy on the hunt for freedom and the Fabulous Killjoys make a few guest appearances. This is my 1st fanfic.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Come on. Just run. Just run faster. Keep Running. Just keep running. You can do this.

I push my legs harder and faster than I felt I've ever run in my life. For my life. Because that's what I'm running for now. Or rather my freedom to be precise, but for me one cannot exist without the other. I risk a glance behind me, to see how close they are, to see if I'm free. Nothing. Clear open desert as far as the eye can see. Did I do it? Is this for real? Thank God, I've finally lost them! I take a sharp dive to my left and roll behind some boulders and crouch there for half a minute to catch my breath. I felt like I'd been running for miles, and maybe I had, maybe I'd covered leagues in my attempt to escape them, but I knew that in reality I had not. My limbs trembled and shook at the very thought of moving from my collapsed position, but I knew I had to move. Had to stay free. I found the last of my strength and willpower and slowly dragged my unwilling body from the ground. I was exhausted and I knew it. I had to find some form of food somewhere. That's what I had been doing when they found me, raiding an abandoned shack, scavenging for food, drink, anything edible. I'd happened across some cans of Power Pup, but unable to find anything to open them with, I went outside hoping to find a rock to crack them open. That was when they saw me. I had heard yells and looked up, unable to believe my bad luck and then ran (I had to drop the cans as they were weighing me down, even more bad luck as I hadn't eaten in days).

That seemed like a week ago now. Running had really taken it out of me. I never was much of an athlete. I wasted a bit of my precious energy on a humorless smile and then glanced around. Still nothing. Still clear, open desert as far as the eye could see. Relieved to have escaped, this still made me uneasy. Had I really lost them? Where had they gone? How could I have possibly escaped their lethal clutches? I cast these unanswerable questions aside and stealthily crept through the cluster of boulders. I was bent double using the rocks as natural cover and this was killing my already dead limbs. Reaching the farthest side of the boulders, I scrutinized my visual fields left and then right, like I was crossing a road, a road that led to my freedom, but with imminent death waiting if I dared to cross. Once again, nothing. That made it three for three. Best do it now, live for the moment or whatever. My hands were positioned flat against the rocks behind me, ready to give me a flying start should I need it, but apparently, I didn't. Seriously on edge with all my hairs on end and my skin prickling uncomfortably, I launched myself out of my shelter and flew across the dry, crumbling earth of the desert...

BANG! Right into the midst of what must be at least 5 units of Draculoids. Unable to stop I crashed right into one, who gave me the best right hook I have been on the receiving end of in my life (and believe me, there have been a fair few). Reeling, I stumbled and collapsed to the ground, blood streaming from some part of my face. Dazed, my vision spun wildly around me, showing me my situation from all angles available. But I didn't need them to tell me that I was in the most shit that I'd ever been in. The Draculoids had surrounded me in a circle whilst I had been having issues with my vision, giving me all the answers to my cast side questions: no; they had been laying a trap for me and waited for me to fall, or rather crash right into it; and no, I definitely had not escaped their clutches. To them, I was dirt, I was filth, I was a bug that needed to be squashed and there was nothing that could make them lose the chase.

I feebly glared up at them through the blood that was ruining my attempt to emanate pure hatred and saw the pair in front of me step aside and there he was, emerging as if he was a mirage out of the hazy desert heat. Korse. I'd only ever heard whispers of his existence and now he was hunting me down personally? This didn't make sense. Not one part of my twisted situation made sense. Korse raised his hand, as if to inform me of my forthcoming death, as if I didn't already know that's what he was here for. As his other targets before me had known; when Korse reared his pale, evil head your life was as good as over.

His raised hand was the signal the Draculoids around me had been waiting for as they silently raised their standard issue ray guns, eagerly anticipating the moment they could pull the trigger. Knowing there was no way of escape even if I could have persuaded my bleeding, aching body to attempt to fight back, I wearily pulled myself off the ground, feeling the burning strain of my limbs and swayed as I stood. I wasn't going to die slumped on the floor goddamnit, I still had a sense of rebellion left in me. My reaction was unexpected and if I could see beneath their masks, I knew their expressions would be confused, but not nervous or worried, the Draculoids never were. Korse grimaced and his face contorted into an expression of pure evil. I closed my eyes, my fear finally getting the better of me, not wanting to see my own death sentence.

It was as I stood there, weary, covered in sweat, grime and blood, swaying on the spot with my eyes closed and my mind filled with thoughts of freedom, that I heard inside my mind the acceleration of a car engine, the squeal of car tyres and the sound of a ray gun being fired, closely followed by the firing of more ray guns. Instinctively, I threw myself on the ground and, squinting through the cloud of dust, I saw the most amazing sight I had ever seen...


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Draculoids being blasted away left, right and center and the sight brought some long-forgotten feeling to my tired, worn-out heart. It took me a fraction of a second to figure out what it was. Hope. It had been a long time since I'd felt anything like it. I would have cried with ecstasy if tears weren't already streaming down my face. My vision wavered and blurred as the tears left streaks through the thick layer of blood, dirt and grime that coated my skin.

Blinking through the tears and squinting through the dust that still hadn't settled, I could see four human-shaped shadows moving through the haze. Straining my eyesight, I could make out an old, weather-beaten muscle car, its engine still running. The bright paint had faded, through too much exposure to that big ball of radiation in the sky no doubt, but I could still make out bright red stripes up the side and, clearer and more definite than anything else, a jet black spider silhouette painted smack bang across the bonnet.

A dark shadow fell across me and, looking up from my sprawled position in the dirt, I raised my eyes to see the mask of the draculoid that had noticed I was still alive although maybe not so kicking. It raised its ray gun (standard issue), savoring the moment. I stared down the dark barrel, knowing there was no way I could escape death this time. The draculoid's finger tightened on the trigger, I waited for the sound of it being fired any second, when BAM!The next thing I saw was the draculoid sprawling much like me in the dirt, only not so much like me it was dead. I could quite clearly see the smoking hole in its back. Once more, I looked up (how many times had I done that today, scratch that, in the last hour, no, in the past couple of minutes?) to see another figure replacing the late draculoid. He was looking down at me, his bright neon-red hair glinting under the hot desert sun. His face was hidden behind a bright yellow eye mask, but under it I could see he wore a curious expression. I quickly took in his blue racing jacket and a smoking yellow gun in one hand and reached two conclusions: one: that this mysterious masked man had saved my life and two: he had my unending gratitude for it.

Before I could even utter a word however, I felt two strong hands around my waist, lifting me off the ground (good, I was beginning to get a crick in my neck from looking up all the time) and half-supporting me, half-carrying me, God knew where. I fought against the iron grip holding me but all I could do was twist and flail in the mystery person's arms. All I could glimpse of the man who had a hold of me was a mane of dark, crazily corkscrewing hair. I felt a sudden burst of pain in my arm as I moved and, looking down, I saw that I did get hit after all. Blood was blossoming out of a steaming rip in my left sleeve. Ouch. You'd think I would've noticed it at the time, but I guess I was a bit preoccupied what with the shoot-out and all. Clasping my grimy right hand around the wound just below my shoulder, I tried to break free of the man's grasp. He just held on tighter, probably trying not to drop me, but I didn't like being carried like a kid, it felt like I'd regressed back to childhood and the grown-ups were keeping me out of harms way. I was suddenly jerked to the left as the fro'd man dodged to avoid a charging draculoid whom the red-head quickly dispatched of. Around us the battle was still going on and the air was filled with rays being fired and the sounds of people dying, the owners of the screams unable to be seen through the thick layer of dust that covered everything like fog, making any details impossible to make out. Not that I really had any time to hang about, seeing as the two men were on the move, carrying me with them.

It was as we were headed towards the car that it happened. The guy who was carrying me tripped and we both went sprawling headlong in the dirt. Rolling around to see what had happened, I could see a dying draculoid holding the guys ankle. Must've grabbed it as we went past to try and stop us. As the two of us were lying there, more of the creeps came running, not surprising, seeing as we'd given them a more than easy target. The red-head masked guy charged at them, gun raised, closely followed by the dark-haired guy who'd been carrying me. Almost out of my visual range, I could see a skinny blonde guy running to help, raising his crimson gun.

That was the last thing I saw. Well, almost the last because next second I saw a big black boot headed my way, a knife almost too big to be real glinting from the toes. My vision seemed to be in slow motion as I watched the boot swing an almost graceful arc before it impacted. The pain as the knife made contact with my face was unbearable. I felt the slice of metal, warmed by the desert sun, pierce soft tissue as it plunged into my right eyeball, the pain exploding like an atom bomb. Hot blood blossomed from the deep wound and flowed freely down my face. I couldn't see anything! The knife had gone right into my freaking eyeball! I couldn't see anything out of my right eye and anything worth seeing with my left was obscured by the blood now pouring in a bright red waterfall down my face. Fury was flowing through my veins as I clutched both hands to my face yet still hauled myself up from the ground, intending to give that draculoid what was coming to him. The pain in my head was building from unbearable to excruciating, the world tipped, my vision spun exposing the blackness that was waiting if I dared pass out and all around me I could hear yells mixed with the sound of ray guns being fired. My vision was totally gone now and the pain was coming to a climax so I didn't see what hit me, all I felt was a sharp blow to the chest and the world being turned upside down before I fell into darkness...


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

I was falling...

Down...

Down...

Down...

Blackness surrounded me, pressed in on me.

Where was I? In limbo? It's a good a guess as any, I suppose.

...

...

What happened? My head is pounding like a mosh pit. I felt like I had to do something although I couldn't remember what.

...

...

...

I'm suspended in this, this darkness. This void. Trapped here with no means of escape. As the realisation hit my sluggish mind I could feel panic beginning to ensnare me. My mind started to churlishly move faster as my emotions started to heighten and I started to go into a full-blown panic attack.

...

...What was I worrying about?

...

...

My mind is feeling blissfully blank. Peaceful even...

...

I sighed contentedly as I slipped even further into the dark...


	4. Chapter 4

Shouting...

Neon-red hair...

Black Widow...

Glint of a knife...

Pain...

Pain? My mind struggled to adjust to the concept. _Pain?_ The dreamy, blurry scene in my head confused me, it was like some crazy, impossible dream. I tried to focus on the colourful images in my head, tried to remember the details, but...it wasn't important anymore. It was just a dream, nothing to worry about. The dream floated out of my thoughts as my mind moved to more interesting topics. Like my current location, for instance. Despite the calm sense of serenity I felt, I could feel something was off. Not _wrong_ exactly, just not quite right. Why was that? I felt fine. Better than fine actually. Yet I couldn't shake the feeling of unease that was slowly creeping into my mind...What was I just thinking? I wonder where I am. I used what senses I could to try and learn something about my surroundings. I opened my eyes: nothing, still darkness. I moved my hands, trying to feel the surface I was lying on. That was odd. I was lying on a smooth surface but it was cold, really cold. Like metal. I inhaled deeply through my nose, hoping I could determine my immediate area by the smell. Disinfectant. The strong, distinct smell of it burned my nose, bringing with it a lesson I had learnt in my childhood: disinfectant meant institution. And institution meant...

I jerked upright and motion-activated lights leapt to life, showing me the deep shit I was in. Harsh blue light stung my eyes and filled the room I was in, but it wasn't just any room. Highly polished sterilized surfaces glistened at me, high-tech medical instruments lay neatly organised on surfaces lining the room. I almost hit my head on the low-hanging overhead light, the sort that wouldn't look out of place in an operating theater in an expensive private hospital. Looking around the laboratory I was in, I could see that I was sitting on an operating table, I swung my legs off the side to get down, noticing how little I felt. Not just emotionally, because I was pretty sure I should be feeling something other than serenity right now, but physically. I remembered being hit in the chest but nothing after that. All the pains of the distant fight in the desert had gone...weird.

Lurching to my feet, I quickly examined the lab I was in. I saw a glimpse of a face and my heart leapt in panic, but on pausing, I realised it was in fact my own face reflected off one of the surfaces. Intrigued, I moved closer. God, I looked like hell! My hair was so covered in dirt and grime it was impossible to tell it's natural colour and hung in greasy, limp clumps over my face which didn't look any better. Dried blood was covering almost all of my face and was artistically streaked down my neck and shoulders. There were bags under my eyes and over my right eye was a huge scar. The scar started halfway up my forehead and ended halfway down my cheek and was interestingly enough shaped like a bolt of lightening, or an elongated 'Z'. Huh. It actually looked kinda cool. Quickly examining the rest of my body, I studied the mess that was my clothes, now completely unrecognisable and wouldn't look out of place on a corpse as they were covered in dirt, dust and blood. They were heavily ripped, but the skin underneath was unblemished and smooth, even on my arm where I vaguely recalled being hit by a ray gun. I could feel the effects of whatever-I-had-been-drugged-with wearing off as the full fear of my situation sank in. Uncomfortably aware of the limited time I had before someone would inevitably find me, I all but ran to a sink and scrubbed the blood and grime from my face, hands and all visible skin. I even attempted getting it out of my hair but all that achieved was just caking the grime in even more...and getting water trickling down my neck to boot. As the last of the bloody water drained away down the sink, I set about looking for a change of clothes. I would stand out a mile dressed as I was, the only speck of dirt in an abnormally clean world. But nada. There was no clothes in the lab except for a lab coat on a hook by the door. I quickly seized it and shoved it on before leaving the room.

Outside the room was, expectedly, a very sterile-looking corridor with numerous doors leading off it. I cautiously tried every door, but they were all locked apart from one at the end. I quietly opened the door and peeked round, bracing myself to run, but all there was on the other side was a deserted locker room. I rushed in and went straight to a locker. I almost cried with joy as I opened it. I'd finally lucked out and inside was an exterminator jumpsuit, the sort that looks like a bio-hazard suit or whatever, complete with mask (which had the BLI logo across the face) and raygun (standard issue). Quickly ditching my lab coat, I pulled off my ruined clothes and dressed in the standardized uniform (white t-shirt and pants), strapping on the exterminator suit and protective gear over the top. I pulled the mask on over my head and slung the ray gun over my shoulder before looking in the mirror. Perfect. I now looked exactly like one of Them. Grabbing the lab coat and my old clothes from where they lay on the floor, I shoved them in the disposal bin as I made my way out the door. The corridor was still deserted. I paused as I reached end of the corridor, breathing slowly to keep my fear under control. Taking a last deep breath to steady myself, I pushed open the door leading to the rest of the building and hopefully, after that, my freedom...


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 **

My breath echoed in my ears as I inched my way down the corridor. My heart pounded with each step I took. Every instinct I had told me to run and it took all the effort I had not to grab the gun hanging at my side and use it. But I had to blend in. Had to avoid suspicion. And running through the building guns-a-blazing wasn't exactly going to help. I reached the end of the corridor and turned left. How many turns had I taken so far? Was this the fourth corridor or the fifth? The layout of the building was getting hopelessly muddled in my head. The sterile corridors just seeming to run into each other. This wasn't a building. This was a maze. A clean, sterile maze. The harsh white lighting burned into my brain despite the exterminator suit covering my head. This place was getting to me. Already I felt like a lab-rat being experimented on. Running through a little maze in the hopes of freedom. I could almost feel the eyes of some unknown scientist watching my every move.

I shivered and cast the thought from my mind. This was no time to freak myself out. I needed to have my wits about me, not send them running off down the corridor screaming as they went. I passed through another set of double doors and heard them click shut behind me. None of the other doors had done that. I turned and tried to open the door. It had locked automatically. There was a keypad on the wall next to it. No way back. Looks like this level is locked. I turned back around to see where I was now and almost sighed with relief when I saw a shiny set of lift doors. To the left of them was a staircase leading up, to the right a staircase leading down. If the building had any sort of logical layout, the stairwell must spiral downwards in a square around the lift shaft, so figuring out where I needed to go next was the easy part. The hard part was working up the courage to do it. My feet felt rooted to the ground and my body froze at the prospect of heading _towards_ the enemy. But I had to. There was no other way. I breathed deeply in and out, I focused on breathing and maintaining a normal gait as I made my way down the stairs. I had decided against the lift as it was too risky, what if there were people in it? What if they discovered who I was? Taking the lift would be a stupid decision and one I couldn't afford to make. So the stairs it was.

I marched down the stairs, the noise of my boots seeming unnaturally loud as it broke the eerie quiet of the building. I breathed deeply, trying to fight off a panic attack. No high-tech drugs to keep my emotions under check now. I passed another floor, level 14, keep walking, another floor, 13, keep walking, another floor, 12, another floor, 11, another, 10, 9, 8... Each of the floors I passed had locked doors much like the one on the floor I started off on but on this floor there was something different. A door left ajar. Why?

I paused on the landing and quickly cast my eyes around. No one here. Just me. I cautiously walked over to the door and peeked around. No one. I was torn. On the one hand, this was a golden opportunity, to take a look around the Better Living Industries headquarters, find out more about them, maybe even find out what they're up to or learn something about them that may come in useful. On the other hand, that would be a very dangerous thing to do. I can't afford to waste time on something like that, the most important thing is to get out of here and never look back, just keep running. I was bound to get lost on this floor, just like I had on the first floor I was on, I had only stumbled across the stairs by chance. Going through this door would be foolish, and dangerous. _Dangerous_. The word echoed around my mind and I tried my hardest to ignore it. I could almost feel it pulling me through the door and leading me down the corridor. That element of danger. I felt my heart race and adrenalin pump through my body at the very idea of it. But no, I couldn't, it was stupid, too stupid. _Yet exhilarating. _I couldn't ignore my curiosity getting the better of me. If I turned away now, the thought of what I could have discovered would haunt me. Would it be so bad? To just take a quick look? I could always turn back, right? Just to the end of the first corridor, then back to escaping. Just a peek.

I quickly crept through the door and made my way along the corridor. From the first glance I could see that this floor was very different from the other one. Soft blue lighting lit this floor from subtly placed lights in the floor and ceiling making the source of the light difficult to place, it just seemed as if the light had no origin, that it just existed. It gave the entire corridor a curiously flat look as it generated no shadows. The floor was highly polished metal, which made clanking sounds as my boots made contact with it. The doors were made from the same metal that gleamed in the strange light; there were no handles next to the doors, just pads that had a strip to allow a card to be swiped. I went over to a door and tried the ID card that hung from the belt at my hips, slowly dragging it through the sensor. A small green light flashed on the pad, giving me the all-clear and I pushed the door open. The room beyond was deserted, just banks of monitors glowing softly in the darkened room. I went over to the screens and saw images from around the city appearing on each of them. One monitor showed an aerial view of the city, another showed a street in a quiet suburban area, another showed a close-up of a woman in a garden, smiling blissfully as she hung out spotless white sheets to dry. The other monitors all showed similar images, classrooms, offices, the interiors of houses. I shuddered at the invasion of privacy. This was taking big brother to a whole new level. I remembered news reports from a few years back, informing the citizens of Battery City of a new method of CCTV: small cameras inside electronic insects, that flew around the city and spied on people 'for their safety'. At the time I couldn't believe people had lapped it up, the excuse of safety had seemed laughable to me even then, but I suppose the citizens were just too indoctrinated to object. I left the room and closed the door behind me with a sick feeling in my stomach, my mind fuming with anger at the injustice that was being carried out. Better Living Industries was a cruel, heartless organization who drugged anyone who objected to them and killed those who rebelled. It was inhumane, taking away people's natures just to create a dull, boring world. Their world.

I hadn't realized I had carried on walking until I heard footsteps up ahead, the clank of boots on metal alerting me to their approach. I glanced behind me, wondering whether I could make it back to the stairs in time, to find that the end of the corridor was nowhere in sight. I must have walked further than I realized when I was lost in thoughts of injustice. Crap! I frantically look around, searching for a place to hide and threw myself at a door, any door, fumbling for the ID card at my belt. In my panic I drop it on the floor, I can hear the footsteps getting louder, two pairs of them. Picking the card up, I attempt to swipe it through the pad and it flashes red. Holy fuck! I was panicking now, my heart throwing itself against my ribcage, every inch of my skin sweating under the plastic suit, I clumsily turned the card over in my hands and inserted it the right way, the light flashed red again. The footsteps were getting closer and in one last attempt, I forced myself to drag the card through one last time, as slowly as my nerves could bear. The light flashed green and I barrel through the door, turning to close it behind me. I exhale heavily. That was close. I rest my forehead against the door, feeling the cold metal through the suit and take a few breaths to calm myself. I was safe. I hadn't been caught. I silently laughed with relief, too shaken to do much more. I felt the adrenalin pumping round my body, and lean heavily onto the door, waiting for the rush to pass. I take a deep breath and smile to myself. My emotions were in a heightened state, flowing through my body: the rush of relief, the giddy ecstasy of escaping, followed by the ice cold horror that penetrated my heart as I realized I was not alone.

"Hello," said a voice from behind me...


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

I froze. Even if I had wanted to move, whether to run, defend myself or even scream, my body wouldn't allow it.

"Hello?" came the voice from behind me again. It was a woman's voice and I could feel it echoing around my head. "Excuse me, can I help you?" Everything about the voice gave me the creeps, right down to the professional tone.

Slowly, I forced myself to turn, first my head, then the rest of my body around. The room I was in could have been the lobby of an expensive hotel; soft white lighting gleamed off the metal walls and tiled floor. The large, spacious desk was made of frosted glass and was in the shape of a large ring that sat in the centre of the room. On the far side of the room were two white doors, one in each corner. Although there was nothing remarkable about them, they gave me the creeps. I couldn't place what it was about them that unnerved me, they just did.

I turned my attention back to the woman behind the desk who was still looking at me with a puzzled expression on her face. She was beautiful. She was blond, with big blue eyes, rosy cheeks, and full, red lips. A slim piece of metal stretched from her ear to the corner of her mouth and I realized it was a headset. She was wearing a plain, white dress which ended at her knees and wrapped across her front, fastening at the side. Her movements were graceful and there was an air of elegance about her. She was, in every way, a perfect woman.

I knew I had to move or she would suspect something. Slowly, I unfroze my limbs and carefully stepped forwards. My palms were clamming up inside the suit and I could feel sweat trickling down the back of my neck. I took another cautious step forward. I shuffled forwards a few feet until I had closed the gap between myself and the desk slightly. "Hello," The woman began again, "and welcome to The Sanctuary. If this is your first time to The Sanctuary then welcome! If you are a returning client then welcome back!" Even her voice was beautiful, if a little unnatural. It was smooth, calm and confident and had a professional tone that made it seem a bit unrealistic. It was hard to notice what it was about her voice that wasn't quite right, maybe it was the eerily professional tone, the constant calmness or the way she spoke. The way she pronounced words was slightly disjointed and often had unusual sounding syllables, like it was automated or spoken by a machine. But she couldn't be a machine, could she? Granted, I didn't know much about what Better Living Industries were capable of, but a robot that convincing? I doubt it. The woman was still looking at me as if waiting for a response. Slowly, I licked my lips in an attempt to moisten my dry mouth. I cleared my throat. Should I attempt to mask my voice? Would she be able to tell I wasn't really an exterminator? I decided to try to deepen my voice anyway and make my voice sound as rough as possible. Or should I not do that? Should my voice be smooth, like hers? I cleared my throat again.

"Wh-Who are you?" My voice sounded smooth as I asked the question, despite my nervousness. I was relieved I had made my voice deeper as it masked any emotion my voice may have shown. "I am known simply as Elysium," she stated. I almost snorted with laughter. Her name meant Paradise, how ironic. "And where am I?" I asked. "You are now in The Sanctuary, a haven for agents, exterminators and draculoids who need to recover and replenish themselves. If you are run down, worn out or feel stressed then we can make you better, we can fix you, all you need is to start one of our recovery programmes and you'll be good as new in no time at all!" Great. More of their propaganda spiel. I had enough of it when I lived in Battery City and I've had enough of it now. I cut off Elysium as she was talking about different programmes and treatments.

"I'm sorry," as I spoke the words Elysium immediately stopped talking. "But I think I'm in the wrong place, I'd better go."

"But you're not in the wrong place at all," she responded.

"No, I really don't need to be here, thank you for your time but it was really a mistake." My voice was straining slightly from trying to keep the fake voice up for so long, but it could hold out a little longer. I cleared my throat.

"Of course you need to be here, why else would you come to The Sanctuary?" she asked.

"It was a mistake! I went into the wrong room, it was an accident. I'm sorry for disturbing you, but I'm going now." As I said those words I turned to leave.

"You can't _leave_," came her voice from behind me. Although her voice hadn't changed and everything about it was the same as it was a few minutes ago, it seemed as if her tone was more forceful than before. I went over to the door that I had only just walked through. There was no handle. I looked at the wall around the door. There was no pad, either to swipe my ID card through or a keypad to type a code into. I reached out, put my hand on the door and pushed. The cold metal was unyielding to my hand and the cold of the door seeped through the plastic of my suit, chilling the damp sweat on my palms. I tried to remember how the door had opened when I entered the room. Did I push it? Pull it? Did it slide open? I couldn't remember. Reluctantly I turned back to Elysium. She hadn't moved since I'd turned my back on her, and was still sat behind the desk, watching me coolly.

The plastic of the suit was sticking to my damp forehead and the hairs all over my body stood on end when I realized I was trapped. Good going. I was supposed to be getting the hell out of here and now where was I? Trapped in some creepy place with a creepy lady. I mentally kicked myself for coming here. For making the stupid decision that led to me walking through that door. I shouldn't be here. I should be trying to break out of this place. Damn me and my stupid curiosity. I should never have come here and now I could never leave. I felt myself start to panic and forced myself to breathe deeply. I needed to think. I needed a way out.

Elysium walked out from behind the desk and approached me with long, elegant strides. She was wearing small heels but even without them she was taller then me by a few inches. My hand impulsively twitched to the gun at my side. My conscious brain repelled the idea; I didn't want to kill her, but as she came nearer and nearer my conscious mind agreed with my subconscious and thought 'what the hell'. I slowly reached down to grasp the handle, not making any sudden movements so as not to alert her to my thoughts and my hand was millimetres away when her strong fingers were suddenly grasping my own and pulling my arm through hers. Her arm had mine in an iron-like grip that was impossible to break. She forcibly led me across the room and around the desk, heading towards the bright white door to the right.

Elysium kept talking to me in her smooth, disjointed voice as we headed towards the door. "Don't worry; we can handle it from here. We're going to build a better you."

A green light flashed as we headed towards the door and it slid open to reveal darkness. Elysium's voice was still talking as we walked towards it.

"We can handle it from here." Our footsteps echoed on the tiles as we approached the dark doorway. "We're building a better you." I was being guided by her steel grip; my footsteps were keeping pace with hers automatically. "Keep smiling." The darkness was covering me as we stepped through the doorway. "We can handle it from here." My feet were still moving forwards yet I wasn't controlling them. We were totally in darkness now. I couldn't see anything.

"We can fix you."


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

It's so peaceful here. I inhale deeply and breathe out, smiling with contentment. I'm lying flat on my back, staring up at the clear, bright blue sky. I stretch my arms out and feel the luscious green grass under my hands. I have never been in a place like this. Maybe I had when I was a child, years ago, but only faded whispers of memories came back to me of years before the Helium Wars.

The sun moved slowly in the sky as I lay there, clouds drifting lazily across it every now and then as they cross the large blue expanse that stretches as far as I can see. I sigh and close my eyes. I don't know how long I lay there like that, lying stretched out on the ground. Minutes may have passed, maybe even hours, but time doesn't really matter in this place just as long as my time here carries on for as long as possible. I never want to leave here. Why would I? It's perfect. There are others here, but they keep mostly to themselves. In fact, I never talk to any of them, I've only glanced them, shadowy shapes on the edge of my field of vision. Sometimes, I'd turn my head, to get a better glance, but they always moved away too quickly and I never could see them properly. They didn't bother me though; my path never crossed any of theirs when I was relaxing here, in The Sanctuary. The only contact I had with anyone was with Elysium. I saw her everyday. I still wasn't sure whether I saw her every day because I had to, or because I wanted to. Just by thinking of her, I could instantly recall every little detail of her features, her full, red lips, her brilliantly white, straight teeth, and the shape of her eyes and the precise shade of bright blue they were, the way her hair fell and cascaded down her back, the way it swished when she walked. The more I thought of her, the more I realized that Elysium _was _The Sanctuary. Not in the literal sense, of course, but to me, she embodied the perfect nature that was everywhere here. In my mind, the two could not be separated. Elysium would always be at The Sanctuary and the more time I spent here, the more I came to love it. I don't think I ever could bring myself to leave here, or to leave her. Just the thought of it made an unusual emotion come into my chest. What was it? Racking my brains, I thought I could place it. Sadness. Yes, the thought of leaving definitely made me feel sad, it radiated through my mind and weighed my body down. I was drowning in it, drowning, falling downwards, sinking...

_I was spinning in a circle, round and round, my arms outstretched, my feet stumbling over themselves as they turned faster and faster. My head was tilted back but my eyes were closed and I was spinning. I was spinning faster than I had ever spun before. I opened my eyes and the room tilted and spun around me. The floor was tilting higher and higher and suddenly, I was lying on it, the room spinning in circles around me, just like I had been doing. I laughed, I laughed so hard. I was laughing as the room slowed to a halt and then my laugh faded and I was just lying there. _

"_Whatever are you doing, sweetheart, hmm?" I heard my mother ask as she walked in to the room. _

"_Nothing!" I giggled in response. I hauled myself to the couch and half-sat-half-lay on it. I was tired from all the spinning. "How was your day at school?" My mother asked as she sat down on the other end of the couch, careful not to wrinkle the full skirt of her dress. It came to just below her knees and was spread around her where she sat. "It was booooring," I whined, "they never tell us anything important, just how we should all be the same. It's stupid, I don't wanna be like everyone else a-"_

"_Darling, shhh! You can't mean that, surely!" My mother looked horrified at the words that had just come out of my mouth, her eyes darted around the room quickly, almost as if she was scared that someone else may have heard me._

"_But I do mean it, all we ever hear about is how great Better Living is and they're not, they're just a bunch of stupid, old-" I was interrupted by my mother's hand slapping my face. My head whipped to the side by the force of the blow and I stayed there, shocked. _

"_Never say that sort of thing again!" My mother bellowed at me. I had never heard her raise her voice before, not even slightly, it had always been soft and gentle, but now it was different and it scared me. I was so scared of her. I immediately leapt off the couch and ran to my bedroom, her screams echoing in my ears. I slammed the door shut and sat against it, tears streaming down my cheeks. My mother didn't follow me. No one followed me. And as the hours passed, Nobody came. I stayed there for as long as I remember, it felt like I never moved at all as the time stretched on, and I was still sat on the floor. The tears had stopped long ago and now there remained only traces of the salty liquid on my cheeks. Nobody had come. Nobody cared. I curled up on the floor, remaining there as I drifted off to an uneasy sleep, and Nobody stayed there with me._

My eyes opened in panic as I gasped for breath, forcing the air through my lungs in an attempt to calm myself. My mind was reeling from the memory, it had been so strong. Where had it come from? What did it mean? My mind was swirling with despair as it was flooded with unanswerable questions then suddenly, with a sharp intake of breath, another emotion overpowered me, pulling me back under...

_Despair. I was running, running faster than I had ever run in my life. I had no idea where I was. Last time I checked, I thought I had passed into Zone 4, but I couldn't be sure where I was now, and frankly, I had more pressing matters to worry about. Every cell of my body was exhausted. My legs were like dead-weights, the only thing keeping them moving was my perseverance, which was quickly draining. My head was pounding from dehydration and the constant heat radiating from overhead, which was being reflected back at me by the hot, desert ground. The glare burned my eyes and pain seared through my head. I had to stop; there was no way I could continue. I had been running for hours. Not continually, alternating between jogging and sprinting, but about twenty minutes ago a team of dracs on motorbikes roared past me, about 30 metres away. I acted instinctively and sprinted as fast as I could in the opposite direction and hadn't stopped since. I quickly wasted some precious energy on scanning the area, my head spinning like the wheel of a muscle car going full speed. As usual, Nobody was there. I felt it was safe to take a short break and immediately stopped running, swaying dangerously on the spot, not having had the effort to waste on slowing down before stopping. I was exhausted, dehydrated and practically delirious as I collapsed on the ground which was a new form of torture; the ground was scorching hot and burned my skin, but I didn't have the energy to move, I just lay there. Darkness fell around me and the temperature dropped from scorching to just about bearable. I raised my head from the ground and saw a patch of weird, stunted cactuses about 5 metres away. Slowly I dragged myself towards them, vaguely recalling a long-lost piece of knowledge to my brain and, not even daring to hope, picked up a sharp pointed rock that was lying on the ground, and began to hack open the flesh of the nearest cactus. I knew it would be a long, arduous task, but I had to endure. My strength almost faded a couple of times, and I had to take numerous breaks, but after almost an hour of cutting the tough, prickly flesh, and with numerous cuts and scratches, a light trickle of milky water came out of the cut xylem of the plant, which I eagerly scooped up to my lips. After draining the plant of all its moisture, I lay back in the dirt as weariness overcame me, and the wind blew something on to my face. I grabbed it and sat up, squinting in the last dying rays of light. It was a very torn, faded poster. The top part of it had been ripped off, but I could make out a picture of the shoulders and torso of a man, with the Better Living logo and the Scarecrow Unit logo on either side. Underneath, in large letters, read: 'WANTED: DEAD OR ALIVE, GOVERNMENT TRAITORS "THE FABULOUS KILLJOYS", REWARD: 1,000,000 CARBONS'._


End file.
